As I was writing and reminiscing about past experiences in special chairs, I was reminded of yet another beloved chair – a very wide wicker one that sits in my back screened in porch. So I went looking for the poem I had written about curling up with a dear friend in that comfy space. The poem captures the essence of another kind of magical chair experience…one that is shared with a special companion.
There are so many times I can recall when I have settled down with someone particular and shared openly and vulnerably and authentically from the heartspace we created together. Longtime friends and family members and new (sometimes even about-to-be-discovered) friends. These connectivities can be enriching, replenishing, and, at times, life changing. Mark Twain said that “What most people need is a good listening to.” Feeling seen, heard, acknowledged, and appreciated can be both magical and empowering. And these times deserve to be memorialized, if only in our own heart.
And so it is that you might sit down with someone you know and reminisce about a “remember when” shared experience of deep communication. To allow that encounter to become even more special, consider doing so in the context of the Chair of Joy™ ritual: Sit. Breathe. Think. Feel. By choosing a common memory and bringing it to mind and heart at the same time, while seated together—or across the miles—, thinking about it and then noticing (and afterwards talking about) what you feel in your body, the happening takes on yet another dimension.
In positive psychology, what is recognized is that one of the ways to enhance any experience is to (1) anticipate, (2) fully experience, and then (3) reminisce about that event. Thinking about an upcoming event in advance, then fully immersing oneself in the journey, and finally, again and again, recalling and savoring that special time, preserves and amplifies the MOJO – moments of joy.
Or you might choose to both come to the chair without a specific common moment in mind, and simply be surprised by what arises within each of you during the process. Then you can take turns sharing about what surfaced…and why…and how it felt to recall that particular time…and the details of how the other person recalled the same incident.
And so, I invite you to make a plan and spend quiet time with someone special, looking back (and perhaps looking forward) together or simply looking inwards at the same time. Savor the full experience. Hold it in your heart as a treasure that you can revisit as often as you like.
True and forever friends we are
how could we be otherwise
so entwined are the stories
of our journeys
that they blur at the edges
of whose good idea or silly
scheme it was that sparked
this or that cherished moment
now revisited as we curl up
together in the comfy wicker chair
warming ourselves
with the kindling of memories
all the while creating a cozy haven
to cradle new dreams
Kindred spirits
in each other’s eyes
we see reflected back
our best selves held sacred
heart to heart
protected from doubts
by the vigilance of our shared
love and appreciation
Chosen companions
leaning on each other
in the chair and in life
feeling our tenderness
toward each other expand
to embrace the world
from the heart, mind, and pen of Minx
©2023 Minx Boren. All rights reserved.
Minx Boren, Master Certified Coach credentialed through the International Coach Federation, develops and presents innovative programs that support health and balance, reflection and achievement. She is trained in Positive Psychology, the Art of Convening, Purposeful Leadership, Positive Intelligence, Emotional Intelligence, Conversational Intelligence, Brain By Design, and more. Minx focuses on supporting her audience and clients to discern what truly motivates and inspires them, what arouses their curiosity and sparks their creativity, and, above all, what brings them joy, satisfaction, and a sense of fulfillment.
Additionally, Coach Minx is a collaborator/contributor to both PurposeJourney.com and PurposeJournal.com. She is also a JOYELY.com Global Ambassador for The Chair of Joy project which focuses on accessing the power of joy to initiate and amplify significant effective change in all areas of one’s life, individually and in community. The work reflects the findings of research in positive psychology, emotional intelligence, and brain science, including processes to evoke heart-brain coherence, While the message is purposely simple, it is bright and full of light. CoJ uses processes and practices that are both inspiring and practical.
Sharing about ways to live one’s most rewarding and meaningful life is at the heart of what brings Minx joy and satisfaction. For more information: www.coachminx.com
It’s time to immerse ourselves completely in the conversation of joy, to prioritize it above most things.. There’s no time to wait; it’s a matter of life and death.
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